“It’s Rashford! It’s Utopia, for Manchester United”

Wow – that’s big. Such was the excitement from Peter Drury’s commentary at the weekend that you’d be fair in assuming that Manchester United had just clinched the Champions League final in the dying seconds.

Unfortunately (for United fans) they hadn’t. They were in fact 1-0 up against Ipswich Town, a team that only returned to the Premier League this season after 20+ years.

If that’s utopia, then things really have fallen to their lowest ebb at the Theatre of Dreams.

But that’s it. It wasn’t utopia. Nobody would claim it was – not even Ruben Amorim, or Marcus Rashford.

So why did Peter Drury?

The Head Commentator at Sky Sports, replacing the beloved Martin Tyler at the start of last season, is consistently over doing it. Hired as the anti-thesis of Tyler, who, as well as being constantly attacked by Liverpool fans for bias, was polling as “boring” from younger viewers.

Drury on the other hand, was consistently going viral for his metaphorical, swirling, pre-hearsed exaggerations. Most notably when Roma came back against Barcelona in the Champions League in 2019: “Roma have risen from their ruins!”

He was so excitable and getting so much traction online that the Sky bosses must have thought it was the perfect solution.

Careful what you wish for.

Football is full of quiet, gritty moments that speak for themselves. Constantly framing every moment in hyperbolic grandeur can start to feel indulgent.

If Rashford scoring against Ipswich can be described as “Utopia” where does Drury go if (and when) United enjoy bigger moments this season?

Drury’s style is undoubtedly unique, but when every moment is elevated to near-mythical proportions, the impact of his words can start to feel diluted. Football, after all, thrives on contrasts—the roar of the crowd, the silence of a penalty miss. Perhaps it’s time for Drury to let the action breathe a little more—because sometimes, less really is more.

“And Solskjaer has won it”

“Machedaaaa”

“Driven straight to Paul Scholeeess”

All iconic pieces of commentary. All iconic moments.

Drury would do well to remember that it’s not the commentary that makes the moment great. It’s the moment that makes the commentary.